


Talking

by HopelessNights



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Dark Thoughts, Drabble, Langst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-11
Updated: 2018-09-11
Packaged: 2019-07-03 14:27:26
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 767
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15820752
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HopelessNights/pseuds/HopelessNights
Summary: Just one of many coping mechanisms for dark thoughts.





	Talking

Talking.

 

For as long as Lance could remember, talking in of itself had always been his coping mechanism.

 

Despite his devilishly good looks and charm and his ever-present cheerful demeanor, Lance had the tendency to fall into the dark endless pits in his mind where dark thoughts would overcome him and fill him with doubts and an overall sadness. For example, his family back on Earth always expressed love through their actions as well as through words. They would give warm hugs, spend time to comfort each other when one was feeling down, tease, and share words of encouragement. However, there were some days where Lance would lose himself to dark thoughts of “they don’t love me” and “they don’t care.” He would stare blankly as his mom would rush past him, busy with household chores and mind rampant with thoughts of his sister’s upcoming dance competition or his brother’s sports team going against that one well-known team in the local area. The dark thoughts would latch onto him as he opened his mouth to tell his mother about something that was bothering him only to be brushed off with a “not now, Lance!” The dark thoughts would dissipate after a while. He would shrug it off and think of the good memories where his mother found time to comfort him in all the chaos that was their family. When he found himself feeling down, Lance would often find someone— _anyone_ —in his family to just simply talk to if they had the time for him. Even if they weren’t listening completely to his words, Lance found comfort in just _talking_.

 

In space, it had gotten worse. The silence was unsettling. Lance never felt more alone. He would often find himself sitting, staring out at the stars as he talked to himself to fill the quiet and provide some sort of comfort for himself. Then, he found solace in talking with the animals in the Castle. Kaltenecker was a sweetheart. As she chewed on her food, Lance would chat with her—one-sidedly—and milk her in order to make milkshakes for the other residents of the Castle. He would spill his doubts to her, lips pulling up into a sad smile and eyes sliding half-way closed. She would never reply or say anything to cheer him up (as to be expected), but just by being there for Lance to lay out his troubles was enough for him to feel slightly better. There were also the mice. They were comforting to talk to about his problems until he found out that they spilled some to Allura. He ceased to confide in them about the heavier material after that.

 

_“Stupid. You’re just a nuisance to Pidge and Hunk. They don’t need you. They’re Team Punk. And you? You’re just the third wheel.”_

 

_“Allura? She doesn’t need you. She has Lotor. Third wheel, Lance. You’re just the unnecessary third wheel.”_

 

_“They hate you.”_

 

_“Do you hear them make fun of you? It’s the truth you know. Every word. You’re just a goofball.”_

 

There were some days where Lance would spend some time drowning in dark thoughts that clawed at his mind, opening old wounds and creating new, deeper cuts. He’d isolate himself to the pain, letting it wash over him. He’d take that hurt, and then he would bury it deep inside of him and lock it up to deal with in the future. From there, he’d paste on a bright smile and face his team.

 

_“Keith left. It should’ve been you. One paladin too many…Lance, you’re that extra unnecessary weight. They should’ve lost you a long time ago when Keith drove off that cliff. Extra baggage…Unnecessary weight.”_

 

_“Blue doesn’t care about you. She never did. You don’t even hold any semblance of a past connection. She ignores you. The Blue Lion knows you’re worthless.”_

 

_“You’re family thinks you’re dead.”_

 

_“Iverson was right.”_

 

_“You’re just a replacement.”_

 

 _“Red doesn’t care about you. You’re just a temporary place-holder until Keith can return to his rightful place. On team Voltron. Where he belongs. Where_ you _don’t.”_

 

_“Shiro snapped at you. He doesn’t think you can provide any useful ideas. You’re just a stupid nobody.”_

 

 _“Keith ignored you when he came back. And you wonder why it hurts so much? Because now you know the truth: nobody—_ nobody— _cares about you out here in space. Hell, you’re family back on Earth probably doesn’t waste a second of their lives thinking about you.”_

 

_“You died. Nobody cares.”_

 

_“Nobody sees you.”_

 

_“Nobody cares.”_

 

_“You’re invisible.”_

 

_“You died.”_

 

_“Worthless.”_

 

And life would go on.

**Author's Note:**

> So, I hope you all enjoyed this fic full of langst. Anyway, I currently made a tumblr for my writing. I'll just be posting stories there as well (same as here lol). If you wanna go check it out: @itscaeya.


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